However, I ALMOST achieved my goal of completing it under 16 min/miles (which is the required pace). If I’ve done the math correctly, I was only 15 seconds behind. I admit, around mile 9 I pretty much gave up on going fast and just cruised to the end. Was I too scared to push myself or was I too weak? I’m not super proud, but I am proud that I came pretty close.
Pre-race: It’s not that cold outside! Awesome.
Mile 1: My giant boobs full of breast milk hurt! How do people with big boobs do this?
Mile 2: There’s a hill! I’m gonna jog for 10 seconds. And I lost Brooke, who I was talking with. It’s ipod time! Also, am I doing a 15 min/mile pace with just power walking?!? Sweet!
Mile 3: I see a big dude wearing a red and dalmatian spotted sparkle shirt. He looks ridiculous. But he’s holding hands with a woman (who is struggling). Awwwww. I make the decision to walk until around mile 10. Then I’ll sprinkle in some jogging if I can. I don’t want to get too tired.
Mile 4: I see somebody with a “I’m proud of you complete stranger” note pinned to her back. Awwwww. Side cramp! Sweet Jesus, side cramp! Somebody’s got a sign that says, “admit it, you just peed a little”. How did they know?!? (or is it just the post-pregnancy pee just coming out?)
Mile 5: I see John. I know his name is John because he’s got his dating profile on the back of his Prince Charming shirt. He’s an attorney from Atlanta. This guy is a genius! I hope he scores a few dates. I also see 2 people with “I’m proud of you complete stranger” signs. Awwwwww.
Mile 6: I see Ellen at the Magic Kingdom! I can’t believe I spotted her out of the massive crowd. I’m also impressed she spotted me out of the mass of runners.
Mile 7: I’m really struggling. My back hurts. Somebody in front of me has a running belt that says, “there will be a day I cannot do this. Today is not that day.” Now I’m pumped up. Let’s do this!!!
Mile 8: (I must have mentally passed out, because I never saw the mile 8 marker. I kept thinking, “man, this is the longest mile ever .. where the heck is it?!?” And then I came up to mile 9. Spooky)
Mile 9: Oh no, I hear jingling. I can’t handing any more jingling Jasmine costumes or jingling gypsy costumes. Thankfully I’m going so slow that she passes me right away.
Mile 10: I see a guy dresses as Ariel. He’s wearing green sweatpants. My gosh, he must be soooooo hot! And there is no way in hell I’m doing any jogging. My body is just too weak.
Mile 11: I’ve been keeping pace with a girl dressed as a candy corn Princess. Her tutu has candy corn felt on it, she’s got a candy corn crown, and I think a candy corn necklace. I ask her about the amazing getup and she explained that her sister insisted that she HAD to dress as a Princess. Kudos weirdo, kudos! I also see some dude dressed as Elvis. He’s got the hair and the strut. He’s amazing!
Mile 12: Time for “all I do is win, win, win no matter what!” on the ipod. I’m looking around Epcot for a friend with a “no time for Walken” (as in Christopher Walken). I don’t see it. But I did see Ellen inside Epcot! I must admit, it’s actually really amazing to know that somebody is waiting for you. It was really motivating to know what somebody cares.
Mile 13: I manage to ‘sprint’ to the finish line. However, the girls next to me decided to hold hands, skip and flail their arms all around, so I basically had to just duck out of the way.