21 reasons why I stink

My favorite blogger, Dana Made It, recently posted a list of “50 things I’m bad at“.  The point wasn’t to ‘shame’ herself, but to prove that her life isn’t as perfect as the blog seems.

Everybody always posts all the cute photos on social media.  Look at my perfect makeup.  Look at my perfect kid.  Check out this perfect meal I created.  Isn’t my house spotless?  Look at my perfect vacation.

Obviously that’s 10% of my life.  Well, maybe 25% because I live near Disney, and that’s pretty darn perfect.  But normally I look like a swamp monster, Bubba’s diaper is filthy and we’re swimming in the pool with no diaper.  Our pool is probably 19% baby pee.

So, I present to you:  20 REASONS WHY I STINK

1. I turn off the baby monitor if it’s after 5am. I figure she’ll be ok until I wake up at 7:30am. And if she’s screaming her head off, I’ll hear it without a monitor.

2. I can’t stop eating cookies.

3. I don’t eat vegetables.

4. I never clean my car. Inside or out.  Ever.

5. I’m a total pessimist.

6. I’m not very empathetic to most things.

7. I don’t like tipping.

8. I find more than 1 selfie per week to be very annoying.

9. I’d rather say home then to go somewhere and fight the crowds.

10. It’s very hard for me to spend money on a buffet. I can’t eat that much at one sitting to make it worth my while.

11. I haven’t read a book in about 4 years.

12. I’m a horrible speller.

13. I’m always antsy to put Bubba to sleep so I can get a break from her.

14. I start projects, but struggle to finish them.

15. My toe nails are pretty gross.

16. I’m a little too thrifty at times. I’m sure it gets annoying to my friends.

17. I tend to think I’m right all the time.

18. I have 0 interest in going to Broadway plays. I don’t see the artistry.

19. I refuse to leave a sporting event early.

20. I’d love to work on my small talk abilities. If you’d like awkward pauses, come chat with me!

My husband decided to help me out and add one:

21.  “You smell”  Thanks sweetie.  🙂

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