I know what you’re thinking. Didn’t I read this same post back in 2014? Yes, yes you did. I decided to torture myself once again.
Actually, this time it was supposed to be motivation. I signed up in April 2015 (also convinced 2 friends to sign up with me – Michelle & Brooke). I thought paying $200 for the WDW marathon would be great motivation to lose some of this Bubba baby weight and whip myself back into shape.
Fast forward to 1/10/16. I’m still carrying around those 30 lbs, and I’m scared out of my mind of the 26.2 miles ahead. I’m trying to compare this feeling to something else. It’s like … I’m scared because I know it’s going to hurt … but I’m excited to try to conquer it at the same time. But I’m scared again because I’m not sure I can do it.
Here’s the run down of me slowing dying:
Mile 1 – Holy moly, this weather is fantastic. It’s 5:30am in early January and I’m rocking a tank top and shorts and I’m soooooo comfortable. Only in Florida. Love it!
Mile 2 – I’ve officially gone farther than I’ve ever trained this entire year. Only 24 more miles to go. #pathetic
Mile 3 – Holy crap … it’s so hot!!! Or, more specifically, HUMID. I’m drenched in sweat and the sun isn’t even up yet.
Mile 4 – I keep passing, then being passed by some guy in a grey tank top. I say “hi grey tank top” every time I pass him.
Mile 5 – Turns out, grey tank top’s name is Bryan, and he’s from Virginia. He’s doing the Goofy Challenge and his legs are a bit sore from yesterday. He’s not a marathon rookie either.
Mile 6 – I lose Michelle and Brooke somewhere in the Magic Kingdom. I also lose grey tank top. However, I see a sign with a picture of Kylo Ren (from the new Star Wars) with the words, “SPOILER ALERT – you’re killing this race!” I can’t stop laughing.
Mile 7 – INTENSE SIDE PAINS!!!
Mile 8 – I found grey tank top again! No Michelle or Brooke though.
Mile 9 – I pass a banner that says “15k”. I have no idea what that means.
Mile 10 – Ahhhhhh … the smelly water treatment plant backstage Walt Disney World.
Mile 11 – It’s a ‘down and back’!!! Meaning, you run down a road for about a 1/2 mile, turn around and come right back. Those are the worst, because you can see where you’re going and see where you need to be.
Mile 11.2 – It’s banana time!!!
Mile 12 – We’re finally inside Animal Kingdom. I’m also getting really dizzy and nauseous. I’m drinking water and yellow Powerade every mile. I’m not sure what to do. I’m scared.
Mile 13 – We’re half done. I’ve never understood how people could just give up while doing a marathon. Why not just keep plowing ahead until Disney picks you up because you’re too slow? But now I understand. I so totally understand. I’m in so much pain. I’m just a walking zombie. Going home and sitting down would be so great right now.
Mile 14 – Somebody is passing out gummy bears. Praise the lord. I also see Kathryn (a friend) cheering, and she yells to me. It sounds so dumb, but a friendly face in the crowd really lifts up your spirits.
Mile 15 – I’ve been following a larger woman who’s been ‘jogging’ the same speed I’m power walking. She’s alone like me. I ask her, “what’s our pace? Are we doing ok?” (I’m fully aware we are BEHIND the pace of 16 min/miles) She tells me this is her first marathon. I start to cry for some reason. She’s pushing ahead, so I might as well also.
Mile 16 – I finally stop to pee. And I find Michelle waiting for me as I got out of the port-a-potty!!!
Mile 17 – It’s finally time for the cold sponges. Sadly, it’s not as refreshing as I wanted it to me. I’m bummed and still really hot.
Mile 18 – There are Hershey’s kisses wrappers all over the floor. Am I too slow that they’ve run out of candy? Clearly the answer is ‘yes’.
Mile 18.5 – I see, what appears to be, and unwrapped Hershey’s kiss on top of a garbage can. I consider grabbing it and eating it. My legs are moving and I can’t make them stop, so I don’t eat the garbage candy. #garbagecandy
Mile 19 – I stop to pee, again. I also find Bryan!!! (grey tank top). Michelle and I also see Julie E. cheering us on inside the Braves stadium. Yay fans!
Mile 20 – I stop to pee, again! I also never run in to grey tank top anymore. 😦
Mile 21 – Peeing again. This port-a-potty was DISGUSTING!!! Just imagine the grossest thing in the world, and I sat ON it to pee. Hey, it was either that or pee my pants. I don’t know what’s going on with my bladder, but it’s completely out of control.
Mile 22 – We’re almost inside Hollywood Studios. At this point Michelle is pretty much dragging me along. I feel like an extra from the Walking Dead.
Mile 23 – I’m peeing again. This time, at least I’m inside the bathroom by the old American Idol building. Not a gross port-a-potty. And, I have to WAIT IN LINE. Come on Studios guests … let the marathoner cut in front of you. Grrrrrr.
Mile 23.5 – We’re almost out of Studios. Once we get to the walkway in a few feet, I know we’re home free. Even though my pace is atrocious, and I should be picked up by the official pacers for going too slow, we’re almost to the point where they just let you finish. I’m crying again … and this time it’s on camera.
Mile 24 – Aixa (a co-worker) gives us Twizzlers. She also sneaks Michelle a Monster energy drink.
Mile 25 – We’re inside Epcot!!! I turn on my traditional “All I do is win, win, win no matter what!” song and start plowing ahead.
Mile 25.3 – Marcy and Steve (runDisney friends) hand Michelle some wine. One of Michelle’s other friends hands her some fruity booze. Basically, Michelle 2-fists the alcohol the next quarter mile.
Mile 25.7 – The ‘balloon ladies’ pass us. This is my first race I’ve ever even seen them, much less have them pass me. If you’re unfamiliar with runDisney, there are some ‘unofficial’ women, who hold balloons, who start LAST and they maintain a 16 min/mile. Basically, if they pass you, you probably shouldn’t be allowed to finish because you’re too slow. But, we have about .4 miles left, so we’re all good. I’m still not uber proud of myself to be passed by them. My pride is hurt just a bit.
Mile 26 – Ahhhhhhhhh!
Mile 26.1 – My tradition is sprint as fast as I can to the finish line. This time, Michelle and I cross the finish line with a light jog, but HUGE SMILES on our faces.
Mile 26.2 – It’s not the physical pain, but it’s the mental pain. A marathon is tough, but it’s even more mental. Quitting would’ve been so much easier, but not for the ego.
Will I do it again? I’ve got 5 in the books. I honestly think I’m done. I keep doing them to prove to myself that I’ve still got some toughness left. This one may have done me in though … we’ll see.